When you become a parent, the whole point is to raise these little humans, help them grow and send them off into the world. Until today, I put together that sending them off into the world doesn’t happen all at once when they’re grown. We get practice steps throughout the years.
Today, we had a big one. I thought I was ready for it. We have spent the last (almost) six years preparing for this moment. Still, when we got to the front of that drop-off line, I didn’t feel ready. He’s been my baby for 5 years, and just like that, I send him into a school building, where I know NO ONE, to start his education.
Academically, Holden was more than ready for this moment. I’m not worried about that. It’s all the other little things that had me on edge all day. Will he make friends? If he has a question, will he ask it? Will he feel safe? Will he feel loved? Now, Holden went to daycare, so I’m sure those of you who know that feel like I’m being dramatic. HOWEVER, during his first 2 years at daycare, my sister was the director and then she was his teacher in the 2.5-year-old room. This is not the same.
Watching your kids grow up is one of the best and most terrifying things all wrapped into one. How do we hold on to them and let them fly simultaneously? I do not have any type of magic solution to this, but I will say something that has helped me is listening to my kids. They will tell you what they want. Then we get to help them be brave and try those things.
This, for me, is bigger than raising an obedient child. Yes, I want him to be a good listener and respectful at school, but I want more for him too. Bravery isn’t just doing crazy stunts. It’s also doing the right thing when everyone else isn’t. Bravery can be correcting someone who says your name wrong or stepping up to help someone in need.
I want to create humans who are brave in a way that they’re not afraid to leave me because they know they can be successful without me, while fostering a relationship that allows them to lean into me when they need it. I want to raise humans who are brave in a way that they go out of their way to do good things for other people, even if it isn’t on trend.
Bravery can mean so many different things, and I don’t think anyone tells us that as parents we are going to have to be braver than we’ve ever been before. While crying on my way to work today, I didn’t feel brave, but I didn’t call the school to check in and I didn’t e-mail the teacher. So in a lot of ways I was pretty brave myself.
Do something brave this week. It doesn’t have to be life altering, but just be brave. While you’re at it, remember to do good things.
Jo is a Mess 